Friday, May 25, 2007

Astounding Feats of Human Intelligence Part 3

Okay, just to warn everyone, this post should probably be disregarded by all of society unless you are actually Hamblore the Canstralian Sloth. If you continue to read this, set your engines for Ranting Speed. You've been warned.

Okay...you know what I cannot tolerate? Superfluous pedantry. Otherwise known as retarded and pointless anal-retentiveness. Now the nature of my work (for those uninitiated of you, I work in pharmaceutical clinical trials), calls for quite a high tolerance of pedantry. Logs are checked, checked, triple checked, filled out in triplicate, blah blah blah. So, it takes a hell of a fucking lot to piss me off. But here we go. Today I rock up to work to find a note on my desk informing me that I am to go through every single individual patient log (that's a lot of logs people) and change all these little entires that some fucking dumb wench has marked with a vomitous little post-it note. Why do the entries have to be changed? Because, as far as I can tell, the vacuous harlet is sucking down vast quantities of ether and has lost the ability required for standard human cognition. She has politely asked me to change every instance that nothing has been returned, and which I have marked a zero (because to my feeble brain nothing=0), to be marked with a 2. Lets say this again. When they return no syringes, I'm supposed to write that they returned 2 syringes. Of course! I'm so stupid! Please pardon me, oh bwana of human intellect, you doyen of analytical thinking! 0 = 2!!!!! I am so ashamed of my pathetic attempt at logical reasoning!

Sweet merciful intergalactic robot jesus. I actaully have to spend the next hour to comply with this inane fuckery. Genius. Fucking genius.

1 comment:

alex_ygd said...

intergalactic robot jesus?! I love it!

Immaculately engineered?